Monday, August 29, 2011

The Desire of My Heart

Why this post has taken me so long to put to words, I'm not sure. It's one I have wanted to write for a long time. Maybe it's the pressure of writing just the right thing or it could be that after getting a little down time, all I desire is sleep in my large, I mean, pregnant state.

Since my freshman year in college, the choices I have made have been very deliberate. My desire, at least from that time on, was to one day have a family and be with them as much as possible. Going into college, they make you declare a major to get you going down some sort of path. I chose Pre-Med since I enjoyed Anatomy and Physiology in high school and liked being challenged in my courses. Let's just say that during my freshman year, I was falling head over heels for someone named D and my thoughts were turning more so to my MRS. degree instead. Seeing as though I knew there would be years of schooling and odd work hours, I knew that a Medical degree would probably not allow me the kind of job where I would feel like I was around enough for my family.

That's when I switched to a double major in Business and Finance. Things went along swimmingly. I married D a year and a half later; landed an internship with a bank which later turned into a career in banking followed by a switch to the PR side of it. By the time I was 25, I was a Blackberry toting, Assistant Vice President with an office overlooking the Galleria. This isn't to brag, but to point out that I still was not satisfied. See, I knew that I was also putting in the kind of hours and commute that make it challenging to be very present at home. I know there are those out there than can juggle it all successfully but something still felt unsettled.

Seeing as though I had always enjoyed working with children and had done so in various capacities throughout the years, I decided to obtain my teaching certificate on the side. Several months later, I became a Kindergarten teacher, leaving the boardroom for the classroom. The first week I started my new job, I found out I was pregnant with Gavin. For four years, I learned that being in the classroom was just as hard as being in the corporate world and I was okay with that because I had Gavin close by and he was staying with people who cared about him very much. I was still unsettled.

Fast forward to this summer when I was presented with the opportunity to work from home, writing and editing Bible study material. D and I felt at peace and still feel at peace to take this job despite other circumstances that are going on. The days are not easy (I'm really not looking for easy because that would just be boring, right?), but the reward is great. I am still trying to figure out schedules and the gymnastics of typing on the laptop when a certain three year old is snuggled up to me. However, I am so thankful that God has allowed this time in our lives. Will I ever go back into the public work field? Maybe. Will I ever get this time back with Gavin and our soon to be little girl? No, and I try to remember that every time there is an upset little boy or floors that seem like they need to be vacuumed three times a day. God has given me the desire of my heart. I can't say it's because of anything that I have done, but only by His grace.

Psalm 37:3-9

3 Trust in the LORD and do good;
dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture.
4 Take delight in the LORD,
and he will give you the desires of your heart.

5 Commit your way to the LORD;
trust in him and he will do this:
6 He will make your righteous reward shine like the dawn,
your vindication like the noonday sun.

7 Be still before the LORD
and wait patiently for him;
do not fret when people succeed in their ways,
when they carry out their wicked schemes.

8 Refrain from anger and turn from wrath;
do not fret—it leads only to evil.
9 For those who are evil will be destroyed,
but those who hope in the LORD will inherit the land.

Saturday, August 27, 2011

21 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights

How Far Along: 21 Weeks

No picture this week.

Size of Baby: About 10.5 inches - the size of a banana - and weighs around 12.2 ounces.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: 0 pounds which was extremely surprising considering I have had a pretty big sweet tooth this week.

Maternity Clothes: It's a mixture when it comes to pants and shorts. Everything else is regular.

Gender: It's a GIRL!

Movement: She is moving around a lot at night and D even felt her move for the first time.

Sleep: Can't get enough but sleeping pretty well. Trying to get the hang of the side sleeping.

What I miss: Sleeping on my back or stomach.

Cravings: My sweet tooth has kicked in. Ice cream has sounded good but it may have to do more with the 100 plus degree temps we have been having.

Best Moment of the Week: Gavin crawled up in my lap one day and said, "Hi baby sister. I love you." He ended it with a big kiss. So sweet!

Sunday, August 21, 2011

20 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights

How Far Along: 20 Weeks

Size of Baby: About 6.5 inches - the size of a small cantaloupe - and weighs around 10.6 ounces.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: Gained 1.5 pounds. I think I'm about back to where I started before I was pregnant with baby girl.

Maternity Clothes: It's a mixture when it comes to pants and shorts. In the above picture, I'm still wearing my regular jeans, but I don't know how long that is going to last.

Gender: It's a GIRL!

Movement: She is definitely more active at night.

Sleep: Can't get enough.

What I miss: Getting up off the floor easier.

Cravings: Nothing in particular, but I am getting hungry more often.

Best Moment of the Week: Narrowing down names and rearranging the kids' rooms. It was really sweet to see Gavin take some of his change he had saved and put it towards buying his baby sister the cutest stuffed owl. He's got such a tender heart!

Friday, August 19, 2011

Five Minutes and Go

I have roughly five minutes to blog and I'm hoping it will be just the thing to get me out of my blog blah. So here goes nothing.

  • My plants are dying. I guess only watering twice each week isn't going to cut it in the 100 degree plus heat.
  • We have been super busy trying to rearrange the house for baby sister.
  • The house looks like a tornado struck.
  • Baby sister does not have a name yet. We are stuck between two names for the front- runner and no, I'm not saying what they are until we've decided.
  • Today marks the halfway point in my pregnancy. Seriously, seriously glad I am not nine months pregnant in this heat. It may be my imagination but I think my feet may have tried to swell up today.
  • I need to do the 20 week pregnancy update, post pictures of our little girl, pictures of how we shared the news we are having a little girl plus go through about 900 other summer pictures.
  • Gavin is goofy and full of so much spunk.
  • Today he wore tall argyle socks (Papaw socks) and light up shoes. His choice and he loved it.
  • My husband makes the best homemade spaghetti.
  • My husband knows just how to cheer up my day with his smile. The flowers didn't hurt either.
That about wraps it up. My goal is to get in more blogging this week, maybe even go through some of those pictures. Summer is about up, but I sure wish the heat took notice.

Saturday, August 13, 2011

19 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights

How Far Along: 19 Weeks

Size of Baby: About 6 inches - the size of a mango - and weighs around 8.5 ounces.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: I lost a pound and a half since last week. If I had known horse stall cleaning would be such great exercise, I may have asked to help a long time ago.

Maternity Clothes: Some maternity shorts. I can mostly wear regular clothes but prefer stretchy pants as in yoga pants when at home. I can tell my fitted t-shirts are getting a little more fitted.

Gender: It's a GIRL! It has been fun looking at all of the little girl items. It's also quite overwhelming.

Movement: Mostly at night or when I sit still which lately is not often.

Sleep: I'm ready to crash at night and still taking my daily nap. Some little boy has decided to start getting up at 7 or like this morning 6:30. It wouldn't be a big deal because I'm already up at 6 except his energy level is through the roof right now.

What I miss: Being able to sit without my back hurting.

Cravings: Nothing in particular, but I am getting hungry more often.

Best Moment of the Week: Looking at all of the cute little girl things and starting to decide on names. We have to pick soon or this child may actually be La La Kitty Kat.

Thursday, August 11, 2011


I have the idea; I have the journal, now I just need to find the time to actually write some of Gavin's funny sayings in it. I'm sure 20 years from now, he's not going to want to search back through hundreds of his mom's blogs to see what he said when he was three. Who am I kidding? There will probably be some sort of new technology that will find this very post by him only asking for it. Well, I'm still going to write in a journal for him and until I can, I'll just post some of his sayings here.

After Gavin was particularly concerned about water being on his Me Me's sidewalk...
Gavin: You made a mess.
Me Me: You certainly like all of your ducks in a row.
Gavin: Me Me you don't have any ducks.

Upon seeing a picture of D and I in Hawaii on my phone...
Me: This is when daddy and I flew in an airplane far away but came back.
Gavin: But you didn't have your cape to fly away.

One evening while we were out near the woods and not close to the restroom...
D: Do you need to go potty?
Gavin: No
D: You can go cowboy style.
Gavin: But I don't have my boots.

One night right after we put him to sleep, he starts crying...
Me: Why are your crying?
Gavin: Because my eyes are all wet.

While getting Gavin up in the morning, he starts to toss out all of his stuffed animals...
Me: Do you really need to throw all of them out of your bed?
Gavin: They are all my best friends.

Monday, August 8, 2011

18 Weeks

Pregnancy Highlights

How Far Along: 18 Weeks

Size of Baby: About 5.6 inches - the size of a sweet potato - and weighs around 6.7 ounces.

Total Weight Gain/Loss: I weighed the same at the doctor's office as I did four weeks ago, so as I see it probably means I gained two pounds with all of the back and forth gain/loss this month.

Maternity Clothes: Some days I wear a maternity skirt or shorts but other days it's all regular clothes.

Gender: It's a GIRL! I was the only girl on both sides of my family and so far there are only grandsons. At least I'll be able to give our little girl pointers on sticking up for herself amongst the cousins and brother.

Movement: Every now and then

Sleep: I'm sleeping pretty good and can even avoid the restroom some nights. Although I still wake up several times.

What I miss: Not much right now

Cravings: The only thing I can think of is the occasional oatmeal pie for when I am really hungry and on the go. I probably had not had those since childhood.

Best Moment of the Week: Definitely seeing baby girl and being able to share the news with family and friends. Her heartbeat sounded good and measurements were right on. I'll have some sweet pictures to share of us telling our parents the news.

Friday, August 5, 2011

It's a .....

Did Gavin's predictions come true?
Will baby number two wear pink instead of blue?
Click on the video to get your clue.

Wednesday, August 3, 2011

Wacky Dreams and Floating Miracles

Today is the day! We are going in for the big ultrasound to see our pint size little person. I can't wait to check out the floating miracle inside me and maybe (hopefully) get a peak to see if Gavin is going to have a baby brother or sister. I'm too much of a planner to wait until the baby is born and the suspense the last few months is enough for me. In fact, last night I had some wacky dream that my doctor was cookoo and because of her weird psychotherapy-like session we completely missed the ultrasound.

My parents have thankfully agreed to watch Gavin for us. I was tempted to bring him with us but I think it would be too long of a day for him. They are off having a fun adventure and when we get back from the appointments, we (I say D) will be helping to unload 100 hay bales. So....I probably won't blog back with how everything went until tomorrow. If I've been in suspense for this long, one day isn't going to hurt everyone else, is it?